The one with the mobile phone

8 November 2017

Dear lady,

Yesterday I heard you talking about us. I heard your disapproval and I felt your judgement.

Look at that young boy on the phone, isn't it terrible?

Initially it made me feel small, ashamed, like a bad parent because to be honest part of me agrees with you as I do wish that my son wasn't on his mobile phone at the beach. I would much rather that he was enjoying the beautiful scene before him than staring at a Pokemon.

But please don't judge my choices without understanding my reasons.

In most of the photos I take of my big lad he has his trusty mobile in his hand.

You look at my son with very different eyes...

I see a gadget that connects me to my son.

I see an aid that connects our son to us.

I see a tool that takes the focus off the things that cause him anxiety.

I see a family out together, relaxed and enjoying a walk without their son constantly asking when are we going home?

I see a family enjoying a drink, in peace  and a boy happily playing.

I feel a boy who struggles with anxiety becoming more confident.

I hear a shy boy actually chatting with the waiter (a stranger) about which Pokemon he has caught.

I feel his enthusiasm and use that to make a connection with him by sharing his passion.

I feel proud of a boy who has started to play out on his own, call for friends and make new friends too.
Butterfly with coloured jigsaw pieces pattern with text

Far from stunting his social development having a mobile has actually expanded it.

His trusty mobile has enabled us to get out as a family and explore new places.

I don't pretend to be a perfect parent, I am a real one! I am not living my life to please others I am celebrating it for what it is.

I will use whatever tool possible to connect my son with the real world and reduce his anxiety. You see my son has autism.

Yesterday I heard you talk about us. I heard your disapproval but I don't care because I know that being a parent is the easiest thing to have an opinion on but the hardest thing to do...

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Photography @My_Dutch_Angle

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